Mar. 17th, 2016

peridot_lines: (TS Eliot - Coffee spoons)
Bi-Annual can mean every 2 years or twice a year, right? Because we don't know how to interpret prefixes for things still, yes?

Life is... weird. Work is strange. My home life is bizarre. At least I have my cat.

I'm going to be 31 in 2 weeks and I think back to my feelings on my birthday last year as compared to this year and while nothing has really changed so much has changed at the same time.

This time last year I was struggling with a co-worker and trying to figure out if it was worthwhile for me to continue at my job. A year later, I am still at that same job. The co-worker has left (much to my and several others' relief). As of right now, I love my job.

There's an element of what I do which is totally ridiculous when I consider applying it to actual life. I think about it sometimes and wonder what is the point of doing this stuff? Work is becoming more and more of a marketing firm in various ways, and I get that on some level that is important, but personally, I dislike advertising and so there is part of me that doesn't like being where I am even when I'm happy doing what I am doing.

In the grand scheme of things, I feel like my job is meaningless. Even so, they're giving me all sorts of weird puzzles to solve and telling me how much they need me and I actually feel engaged in this company which is a first in probably the entire time I have been here; which is 6 years as of last week.

I'm willing to chalk some of this up to my introverted nature, but it's taken me this long to finally come around to the idea that I can collaborate with people around here and they actually want to hear what I have to say. I've spent so much time trying to go unnoticed because for me, that felt like it would be a huge risk. I think I have finally stepped out from my little cave to try to be a part of things, or at the very least use the tools they have given me to figure out what it is I want to be doing. Plus, it's a huge confidence boost to have multiple people tell me how impressed they are with my work.

That feels like bragging, maybe it is, but there's something very satisfying in being able to say no one else where I work can do what I do as well as I do it. I had someone recruit me for a content creation team they are trying to put together (literally, they came to my cubicle and said "I've heard so many good things, I can't wait for you to reply to the email I sent out, please consider joining our team). So far, I've written one thing and have yet to receive any actual feedback, but there's that.

I get the feeling there are some things coming down the pipe around here. Last summer we had a real shakeup and I think a lot of people have been in the process of sorting out where they want to be and what they want to be doing; I know I have certainly been thinking on things. 6 years ago, I didn't see myself lasting 5 years in this place. Now, I am starting to consider the possibility that in another 5 years there are a lot of things I could accomplish; some of them around here, some outside of work just because I have been here.

I'm hopeful anyway. It's a good feeling.


peridot_lines: (Default)

March 2016

13141516 171819

Most Popular Tags

Page Summary

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 26th, 2017 02:07 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios